bf: come over
me: dont u have a period?
bf: we’re gay
me: oh yeah
I FOUND IT
NO ONE BELIEVED ME WHEN I SAID I HEARD AN ICE CREAM TRUCK DROPIN BEATS DOWN THE STREET
NOW I HAVE A VID TO PROVE IT OMG I’M SO HAPPY I DIDN’T IMAGINE IT YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS MAKES ME
in elementary school i hit this kid cause he said i cant punch and i broke his nose and then my stepdad picked me up and the office was like “you have to say sorry” but then the kid was like “but she proved me wrong, she doesn’t have to say sorry” ladies and gentlemen my best friend of many many years
this is violently beautiful
do you have a family yet?
why get a job when you can sell oregano to middle-schoolers and tell them it’s weed
Rihanna casually whooping some ass outside the club
My biiiiiiiiiiitchhh lol
just saw Syrup
fukking terrific movie
the more sexual and inappropriate you are with me the better we’ll get along